The Tapestry of a Family

I love tapestries. They always mean something. There is a message in the image that can speak to the heart. This is just as true of the tapestry of a family. The hidden depths of the relationships can show the beauty of the front side, or the snarly mess of the back. No matter which side is seen, its all important because we cannot have the sweet without some of the bitter. 

The tapestry of my family has always been challenging. I spent years focusing on the snarls, instead of the beautiful. I had trouble finding my way past the backside of the image. Time does many things, and sometimes, it really does heal wounds. It took me a long time to get to the place where I can remember the good things, and not focus so much on the bad.I had to get help, and experience a lot of God-given grace to get here. Now, when I think of my family, I don't automatically battle with negative emotions, I often smile at remembering good times. 

Why is this important? Its part of my ongoing emotional healing. Abuse, whether your own, or a family member's leaves scars on the heart. Regardless of the kind of abuse, it holds us back from believing we are worth following our dreams. What often gets left behind is a feeling of worthlessness. That causes despair, and leads to severe depression and isolation. Many people have no idea that their depression isn't the root cause of their problems, its actually a symptom of something else. 

My family's tapestry isn't new. Its old. It comes from childhood. It did not carry into my adult years except as it relates to dealing with the snarls of the backside left behind in my heart and mind. I have spent a lifetime working through them, clipping the threads and cleaning it up up emotionally one by one. I have had great grace given to me along with a loving husband to help me on my journey. 

I engage in battle each day to experience the joy of living and breathing and its worth the fight. I am a positive person by nature, and when given lemons, I do my best to make lemonade out of it. I am a fighter, and not a quitter. I want good things for me and for my loved ones and those around me. It is worth fighting through the snarls of the backside of my family tapestry so that the beauty of the front can shine through. 

Dr. Who has been around for 52 years and is still going strong!

If you have no idea what a Tardis is, then the words Dr. Who are not going to mean anything for you. This BBC show has been around through many major events in the world at large. The various Dr. Who’s have see World Wars and nations change hands. Dr. Who has worn many faces as well over the years, and had many companions to help him on his adventures.

The first Dr. Who started his journey in 1963. His companion was his granddaughter Susan. Together they battled a celestial toy maker, jogged through Rome, Mongolia and France making sport of the various leaders of those times, kept the Daleks from fulfilling their goal of Galactic domination. At the end of three seasons, this Dr. felt the pull to change, and so he went through his transition. When he was done, the second Dr. Who took over and had a far different personality than the first.

The first Dr. Who pretty much kept his work on earth, but the second explored the stars and battle space pirates and cybermen. This fit with the times because by the time Patrick Troughton took over the role, the world had become space mad. Keeping the content of the show contemporary with the times was something the writers and directors were very good at. This Dr. Who also dealt with being tried by his own people for interfering too much with. The forced him to regenerate into a new iteration of himself. Troughton was Dr. Who for three seasons before John Pertwee took over in 1969.

Each Dr. stayed for a span of years, traveling backwards and forwards through time with their many companions helping them accomplish the mission of protecting Earth and the Galaxy at large. Each Dr. was a meddler in the affairs of men, but always with the intent to help and aid mankind. They fought off attacks, obliteration, and mind controlling attempts by a host of enemies. There have been twelve Dr’s across the time of the show.

Each of the Dr’s have had unique personalities, and have tackled cultural elements contemporary to the time of their roles. One of the reasons why the show has stood as fresh for so many years is due really to two things. The contemporary feel of each Dr as they have crossed major events in the world and dealt with them, is one. The second is that there is a sense of timelessness to the Time Lord. Often taking The Dr. out of this world and into space has renewed the show’s vigor.

Honestly as the world has enjoyed this show, and me as well, I have favorites among the cast of Dr’s. I loved Tom Baker and his quirky personality. Those are some of my favorite seasons of the show. He was The Dr for seven years before passing on the torch to the next one in line through regeneration. Of his companions, my favorite was Sarah Jane Smith. She stowed away on the Tardis while investigating a story and ended up with The Dr from 73–76. I loved her feisty attitude! This companion was so great, they brought her back in 2006 with David Tennant.

The ninth Dr. Christopher Eccleston picked up his torch in 2005. He was the last surviving Time Lord after the Last Great Time War. He was only The Dr for one season because he gave over his form to save his companion Rose. One of my favorite stories with this Dr. was when he took Rose to see the end of the world. He had some attitude issues, but there was just something about him I enjoyed as The Dr. David Tennant picked up the role next. He held the role for five years. I really liked this Dr a lot. Like Tom Baker, this Dr was quite quirky. I really like that kind of character development. One thing about the Dr is that he, in his many iterations, seems to battle the same group of enemies over and over again. I also love that many of the companions come in and out of The Dr’s life over the course of time. It makes for a very special kind of show.

A whole new saga started with the eleventh Dr. This was supposed to be the last regeneration. I knew they would find a good way around that! Why get rid of a great thing?! Matt Smith held this role for three years, and covered a lot of important story ground. For the first time I have ever seen it, The Dr got married! He has had many companions, but never a wife! He also had the opportunity to see his own tombstone, and meet a past him and get to straighten out his own past mistakes. He worked with the tenth Dr to save his home world instead of seeing it destroyed. For his hard work the Time Lords granted him a whole new cycle! Yay, more Dr. Who! This brings us to the current Dr. This Dr is older, had forgotten something as basic as running the Tardis and had to have his companion teach him, and is getting to have some time off to hang out with his wife River Song.

To find a series that has stood true to its story line, and endured is amazing! Its pretty unheard of when it comes to the entertainment industry. Through its many ups and downs, and Dr’s and companions and enemies, not to mention the real life events of the world around us the viewers it has remained an integral part of British television and with the advent of technology to allow for shows like this to be seen the world over, a major favorite for fans all over. I might not like going to my Dr, but I love me some of 

It’s A Gas, Gas, Gas!

There are some days that life just seems like a bitter pill. It takes a lot to make you smile because you just don’t feel the love from people around you and especially not from the world at large. This A.M. it made me think of Jumpin’ Jack Flash. That song, sung by the Rolling Stones in 1968 is gritty. Of course most of the time life is gritty too, so the song resonates with many of us who find hope in surprising places, and can laugh at unexpected moments.

The movie Jumpin’ Jack Flash, released in 1986, is a pop culture classic in my opinion. You have a gal just doing normal everyday things, working at a bank job with a boss that is a jerk, and all of a sudden she is contacted by someone via her computer who is in need of help. Its not a straight forward cry though, its very mysterious. Who is this dude? He seems to be a spy caught somewhere and needing a way out and he needs Terry’s help! Let the games begin because its a gas, gas, gas!

For this spy, Terry is his hope. Through her he can get the help he needs to escape his trouble. Its pretty bad, and talking with her, walking her through what to do to help him, encourages him not to give up, or to lose hope. We all need that sometimes don’t we? I know I do.

Life seems to be full of woe today. There are a lot of really bad and sad things happening. Every time I read the news via my computer, or watch anything on t.v. I get an ache inside because its heartbreaking. Why can’t we be kind to one another, loving, respectful? Why do we have to hurt people, make other fearful? Why can’t we get along? For whatever reason, it make me think of the son, Jumpin’ Jack Flash. The subject of the song has been down and out, had troubles, and even been left for dead. How does he respond to the bad he has been handed? He says its alright, its a gas, gas, gas. What he is really saying is that its alright now, its wonderful, life is actually good. He has let go of the bad to grab a hold of the good and he isn’t letting that bad drag him down!

There are some important life lessons in there. Terrible things are going to continue to happen. I wish they didn’t, but hey, its not up to me. So, how can I deal with it? I can decide its not going to hold me back from still giving others good. I can give a smile to those around me that I don’t know. I can treat others kindly and be a source of hope instead of the pill they have to swallow because of my bad attitude. I can run around today with the non-verbal message in my face, and body language and attitude that its alright, its a gas, gas, gas! Let’s all be kind to one another today and pass on hope to others so that, today, their bad feels a little lighter!

Posted from Original Reveries Published by Elise Welburn Martin a Medium.com Publication

The Power of Flowers and Sunshine!

Do you ever battle with too little sunshine? I sure do! If I go too many days without soaking up the sun, I get grouchy! I could never live in Alaska, though it is such a beautiful state, because they literally spend six months of their year in the dark! I am like a flower, and I need that sunshine to be healthy!

Right now my home is filled with flowers. Its summer, so the flowers are blooming in my yard, and it was also recently both my anniversary and my birthday, so flowery presents have come my way! I love it! They are pretty to look at, and fill my house with some of my favorite scents. Due to the summer weather the sun is shining a lot where I live, which fills me with feelings of happiness. Why do the flowers and sunshine have such power over me?

Research continues to show that flowers indoors, along with plants, give a sense of mental well-being. It brightens up your space with color and something alive and fresh, and that improves our moods. In addition to the looks of the flowers, the scents actually can be a source of relief from anxiety and stress. That is one of the reasons botanicals are used in essential oils that go into lotion, bubble bath and diffusers so that, when fresh flowers are not around, we can smell them and feel more relaxed.

Flowers are interesting and beneficial in a variety of ways, and another is that they are a language all their own. Granted it is us who has assigned meaning to them, but flower messages are part of our culture in a very real way. Different flowers have different meanings to people, and we read emotions by them. If you give a gal a dozen roses, it symbolizes emotion and worth. Roses are expensive, so it tells us gals we are worth the cost of those roses. When you add in the color of the rose, well it says a lot about your feelings for us. Guys, never give a red rose to a gal unless you want her to believe you love her! The emotions of flowers are a big deal to us gals!

So, what about the benefits of sunshine? Well the first benefit is that it is light. Do you feel the blahs when it is cloudy? A lot of people do. There is a reason for that. Sunlight is known to provide real health benefits. It increases levels of serotonin. This hormone is often called the happy hormone. We all have it, and we all need it. I helps balance us out and improves mood. In addition to happy feelings, sunlight also uses serotonin to to keep our circadian rhythms straight so that we can sleep at night. Sunlight helps our bodies produce Vitamin D naturally, so that our bones are stronger over time. Finally if you are battling with a skin condition, sunlight can actually help you along the way to clearing it up!

So, a mood booster, with real physical benefits, both flowers and sunshine really are a power in their own right! Beautiful to look at, and to enjoy, and healthful for us too! Nothing like the power of flowers and sunshine!

Reprinted from My Stories at https://medium.com/@elisewelburnmartin

On the Sunny Side of Crazy!

Sometimes life is full of a whole bunch of gunk. I feel like a hot mess! In the midst of it, I think about screaming, but usually I find a way to make it all good. I tend to be a glass is half full kind of person. I like to find ways to make sense of my minor bouts of crazy life moments.

I kid with my family and say "I might be crazy, but ha!, not enough to commit me!"  They always laugh at me because they know I am really not kidding. Now I know that there are varying degrees of crazy, and some of those degrees are really a bad thing. When I talk about crazy I mean wacky, a little zany, fun loving, full of good humor that is not traditional in all senses. That is my crazy. Sometimes I feel a little more crazy due to hormones, but hey, that is a different kind of story and not for today.

Sunny side up. Well my first thought is eggs that haven't been cooked all the way. Their golden round goodness like the sun in the sky. Its bright, and cheerful and oh so tasty. So my sunny side of crazy is all about good, fun loving, exuberant and very whimsical humor. Its me singing a familiar song, but not remembering all the words, but I don't care, so I will make up my own words, and if you don't like it, well that is your problem because I am enjoying singing because I am full of music!

So much of life is so serious, and hard. People like me tend to lighten the mood. We can be very serious ourselves, and our sunnyside of crazy helps keeps us grounded and sane. We feel things deeply, and care a great deal and this kind of heart restores our balance. Its all about perspective. I practice this kind of crazy every day. If you see a nut driving down the road with a big smile on her face, and it is obvious she is singing a song and be bopping in her car as she is driving along, it might be me! Or someone like me that is just full of some kind of joy and letting it out. Those people should cause us all to smile because we need them in life. They help us keep perspective that not all of life is hard. They bring a laugh, a smile and a sweetness to life.

My sunny side of crazy says let me be an energy giver today instead of sucking that energy out of everyone around me because I am a grump. It says, lets work together to be joyful and to care, and to help others even if its just with making them smile. I am bound and determined, when appropriate, to help those around me enjoy a little bit of my crazy so that hopefully their day might be just a little bit better! Come along for my ride! I am waiting to laugh with you!

Shoe Sale 40% Off!

I will share honestly that I love shoes! My husband has called me Imelda Marcos when it comes to my shoe buying habits. Today I went with my son to an appointment and while he was having his eyes examined, literally, I went next door to the shoe store! Woot! I wandered around enjoying trying on this pair and that. I found a pair that I really liked, so I toted them around while making sure they were really the one. I had decided before going into the trenches that I would walk away with only one pair today.

I finally made it back to the clearance area, and found a pair I liked even better than the first pair. So, I put the first pair back and toted around the second pair. The first pair was full price, the second pair was about the same original price, but had 40% off. I got to the next rack and found a pair of wedges made by Sofft that I fell in love with! So comfortable,and so stylish. I love that I can dress them up or down depending on my outfit. I restocked the second pair I had been toting around and snagged that third pair for my own. Sometimes you hit on a pair of shoes that you just know is it! Those shoes were it. I didn't even bother looking at the last rack. I found my one!

The beauty of those shoes is that they were fifteen dollars less than the second pair at original price, and on top of that they too were 40% off! Woot! I was practically giddy! I bought my shoes, met my son at the optical place, and hung around until he was done. We had thought he would need his eyes dilated, so I went as designated driver. He didn't end up needing it, but boy was I glad I went! Those awesome shoes are mine! They were sitting on the table when my hubby got home tonight. How does he handle my shoe buying habit? He laughs, asks me to show them to him on, and then, because I usually end up buying in the clearance area, listened to me share what a great deal I got on them and all about my 40% off buy! He calls my shoe buying shoe therapy, and usually when I go buy shoes its not just because I love shoes, I have something going on in my head space I am trying to work out.

Life is complicated, challenging, and full of both joy and sorrow. We all have our coping mechanisms. For me, today, it was that shoe sale 40% off that cheered me up and helped me pop a smile instead of continuing to frown!

Waspecades and the Screeching Lady

Once upon a time, this lady had a swimming pool built in her back yard. She watched it go in with extreme excitement, for she could not wait to dip her tootsies into the warm, blue water. Through many long days she waited, sometimes patiently, sometimes not so much. Finally the day came when the pool was done and the water was cold, but who cares, right? In she went. It was October, and the weather was still reasonably hot so the cool water felt good. She only got to use it a couple of times before the season changed, temperatures cooled and the pool went into maintenance mode.

She eagerly anticipated the weather warming back up so that swimming could once again be done. It was March when the weather was warm enough to really start swimming. Little did she realize she wasn't the only one that would be enjoying her pool. The community was obviously tight knit, so the wasps also came to play. Urgh! How dare they! She had her pest company come out and spray her yard and eaves, but she could not go door to door and have the same thing done for all of her surrounding neighbors. She watched, as she floated in her pool, as waspecapades were done in her pool by the neighboring wasps who saw that body of water as a great place to grab a drink and cool off from the heat of the day.

That lady screeched many times in the following years. I am sure the neighbors find it quite amusing. If it were me I would say to her, what did you expect, the pool is outside with all the bugs and it is a big drinking hole for them to enjoy. Reason sometimes has little to do with phobia's though. This lady isn't fond of bugs, especially stinging ones, and so when they come into her vicinity you can see her paddling furiously around that pool and you can hear her screeching at them to get away from her.

Time to fess up. Yep, that screeching lady is me. Logic has nothing to do with this at all. I know I am a lot bigger than those flying bugs, but I don't care. I haven't wanted them using my pool to get a drink. I want to enjoy my water space without worrying about their waspecades. I did notice something this year as a new pool season has started. There are not as many wasps as before. I have floated and swam several time not being bothered by them at all. It makes me wonder which watering hole they are dipping their toes in, or whether my neighbors are having their yards sprayed. I won't go so far as to say I miss them, but I realized you can get used to most anything if you have to, and apparently I got used to my wasp company, so I wonder where they are roaming these days. Do you think my neighbors will miss my screeching at all? I can't help but smile at the thought.